The “Ping” factor
An addiction to your smart phone
Are you someone who is at the mercy of every ping on your phone?
Does it disrupt your day and make you anxious?
The average person checks their mobile every six seconds during non-working hours which amounts to about 110 times a day. It almost makes one wonder what we did before the era of the smart phone. We were still content, and our times back then, were filled with different pursuits…. more meaningful ones might I add.
Addiction to your smartphone colloquially known as ‘‘Nomophobia’’ which essentially means a fear of being without a mobile phone, is very real. It hampers one’s ability to focus and do deep work as it affects concentration. It also affects our sleeping patterns sometimes. Not all of us suffer from an addiction problem per se but we might have a compulsion to look down at our phones more often than we look into the eyes of a loved one.
If your job requires you to be on your phone, then that is a different matter but what I refer to is one’s need to be on it for emotional regulation.
A need for validation through posting pictures and personal events for likability and approval.
A need for feeling loved and included by sending texts and eagerly waiting for a response.
An anxiety that builds up when the phone does not ping.
Think about yourself in a burning building for a minute. Close your eyes and think of three objects you can take with you as you run out of the fire. Assuming of course that your loved ones have made it out of the building safely. More than half the people who respond will unquestionably add their smart phones to the list.
Why does this three-by-five shiny object on the palm of our hands hold us to ransom in this way?
Why has it over time, moved from a device of convenience to an object of absolute necessity to some, and an item of sheer anguish to others?
First generation smart phone users find communication through their smart phones a normal part of their existence as they were born in the era of the smart phone revolution. The older generation who have been introduced to this device in their fifties and above, look at it with trepidation and still prefer to use it only when absolutely needed. The generation in between (the one that I belong to) have learned to adapt to the smart phone’s many advantages but were also the lucky generation to have played outdoors with mud and sticks making lasting memories, shrouded by fresh air and camaraderie.
But there is hope. There are a few things that one can do to limit phone usage if you are among those people whose job is not dependent on the same.
- FIGURE OUT YOUR “WHY”
Why do you feel the need to look at your phone so many times a day? Is it because you are anxious or bored or seek validation or any other reasons that come to your mind.? When you figure it out go deeper and ask why is it you feel that way? Are there things you can do to address the same need differently? If you are bored can you use your time in a more productive way learning a new skill, connecting with a friend by meeting up with him/her or taking on a new course or maybe even reading or painting more. When I dug deep, my answer was plain and simple…. it was boredom. With the lock down and my bespoke bridal business slowing down I had a large amount of time at my disposal each day, spread out like an open wasteland. I decided to take on a new course to occupy this time, give my brain a new challenge and learn something amazing in the process. It will thus help me reinvent myself altogether but that’s a story for another day……
2. SILENCE YOUR PHONE
If you are not in a critical job or role and can afford to be away from your phone for long periods of time then get into the practice of putting your phone on silent mode during certain times of the day so that you are not at the mercy of every “ping”. When I need to write an article or do research for my next freelance project or when I need to study, I get into it by setting an alarm on my phone that will signal the end of my “deep work time’’. It could be just an hour or several hours together. But it avoids any distraction in checking the time incessantly as the phone will do its job and remind you. This blocks off a chunk of time for me to have a single minded focus on the task at hand without having to look back and forth to see which rabbit ate two carrots for breakfast and which friend made it an entire day without having a single piece of chocolate.
3. LIMIT YOUR TIME SPENT ON SOCIAL MEDIA
Let’s face it. Social media with its addictive whirlpool of entertainment can get addictive. If you are not careful you can be scrolling mindlessly for hours and you lose an entire day that you are never going to get back. How much have you learnt from all these videos you have watched? Most often the answer is a big fat nothing. Then there is the lure of online series that friends have recommended as a ‘‘must watch’’. In this world of temptations, one still needs to study or work and earn money. Limit your time spent on these time magnets. If an alarm system works for you, then go ahead and use it to naturally cut off your time spent on them and move on with your day ticking off the tasks that actually need to get done. If you have the option of tracking usage on your phone (most phones will), check it once at the end of each day to know the duration spent on your device. It normally gives you a breakup of the amount of time spent on each app, that you have as well. If you do not like what you see, do better the next day and then the next. Suddenly you will find hours of time that you can use to do anything other than looking at a screen.
Imagine a world where you sit at a café and see people chatting with each other, laughing with reckless abandon, nodding at you in acknowledgement because they have actually seen you. Imagine that no one feels the need to whip out their phone when a cookie perched on the edge of a saucer, is served at your table. Seems like a fantasy world doesn’t it? But while you can hardly change the people around you, YOU can be one of these people . If more people became oblivious to the “ping” on their phones this fantasy can become a reality even if for a small pocket of time in the day.
We need to move to a world where our attention goes rightfully back to nurturing human relationships. Look at the person in front of you. There’s more value you will get from the warmth of holding someone’s hand than holding your phone.
Let our phones not be the master of us.
It’s in your hands to make it happen, literally. It will be well worth it.
